Spreading Katy’s Kindness

This weekend our family experienced a truly magical weekend. Together with two of our KMMF board members, Bethany and Liz  we ventured back to the hospital that we love so much. To drop off 920 TOYS in honor of Katy’s 9th birthday this month on December 20th.

img_2706

The toys we have collected for the last two months were piled high into a rented u Haul  (my mini van couldn’t house them all this year). These toys that were so lovingly picked out by all of YOU to be brought to Boston Children’s Hospital in honor of our little girl were escorted by the Arlington and Chelmsford Police with Patrick manning the sirens.

img_2613

img_2693

I have been painstakingly working on my relationship with Katy and what parenting her now looks like.  This weekend it was clear that this is how I do that.  I’m parenting Katy when I work on her foundation, I’m parenting Katy when I share her story, I’m parenting Katy every moment of everyday just as I do Patrick and Riley. I’m still her mama and she is is still very much my daughter.

img_2682

For the first time in two and a half years I feel a bit of peace, a bit of happiness, a bit of excitement.  Is this the way I envisioned I would get to be Katy’s mama? Absolutely not! But, this is all I have.  This is my only option.  So I can choose to parent her by sharing her love and light and spreading her kindness. There are no other options.  This is all I get.  This is HOW I get to be her mom.  This is how I get to care for Katy and show my love for her.

img_2685

I still don’t know the why, and I doubt  I ever will.  I still don’t expect that this will ever be enough… I want so very badly to be driving her to ballet and soccer and painting her nails, and watching her interact with her brother and sister, most of all holding her and cuddling her and watching her grow up. But, I am learning to not question if every second of everyday, and to just be in the moment.  When I allow myself to just be in the moment I feel peace, happiness, and love.

Thanks to all who donated.  I can’t tell you what it means to us to be able to give back to the hospital that did so much for our daughter. We couldn’t have done it without you.

XO

Amiee

 

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s